Willie Waffle Movies

Endless Love – The Greatest Love Story No One Ever Wanted Told – Review

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Photo Courtesy Universal

It’s the greatest love story no one ever wanted told.

Alex Pettyfer stars as David – the misunderstood bad boy mechanic with a soft heart from the wrong side of the tracks.  He just spent most of his high school years with an unrequited love (or lust) for Jade(Gabriella Wilde) – the lonely, outcaste blonde-haired, blue-eyed, dewy, long-legged girl from a rich family with a perfect smile, but no friends (because no one in high school wants to hang out with THAT girl).

Of course, David and Jade finally realize each is interested in the other, and it leads to a passionate, torrid affair that has Jade’s Dad, Hugh (Bruce Greenwood), concerned this bad boy is unleashing his daughter’s  inner wild child!

Are Jade and David meant to be together forever?

Will Daddy break them up, using any means necessary?

Sadly, this movie proves RoboCop is still the most romantic movie premiering the week of Valentine’s Day.

It’s not so much that Endless Love is bad (because it is), but Endless Love is completely bland until it falls apart in a series of ridiculous melodramatic twists and moments.  Co-writer/director Shana Feste and co-writer Joshua Safran play it safe and boring as they create (or, I guess we should say re-create since it is based on the 1981 movie), a typical, run-of-the-mill, very old fashioned, immature teen girl fantasy complete with the young lady displaying her independence by making bad decisions in the most obnoxious way possible.

The audience gets plenty of meaningless scenes of David and Jade looking all googly eyed at each other with exclamations of undying love, and we get the requisite scenes of Daddy becoming all hot and bothered under the collar at the whole situation, but, of course, he’ll be upset because he’s the stuffy rich guy who is out of touch with the passions of young people (the stereotypical villain).  If it all stayed there, Endless Love would be forgettable tripe, but it doesn’t stay there.

Feste loses the story as Daddy’s actions to rid his family of the menace he calls David boil over.  The melodramatic escalation becomes laughable, as does poor Greenwood’s dialogue.  You have to feel bad for a professional like him, as well as Robert Patrick as David’s Dad and Joely Richardson as Jade’s Mom.  They know how bad all of this is, and the audience is laughing at how bad it is, but they persevere.

It’s one thing when Pettyfer opens up the movie with a narration that comes off more as creepy and lecherous because that’s the best work he can do and should get.  The others should have better options.  Even Wilde would be better off as a model.

1waffles_sml1 Waffle (Out of 4)

Endless Love is rated PG-13 for sexual content, brief partial nudity, some language and teen partying. 

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